The dilemma is, when thinking about it, going for a jog (with a sports complex so conveniently nearby) appears the easiest and least troublesome way to get exercise. And barring that, I really wasn't getting any exercise, despite how I tell myself that running isn't for me... Everything else just takes too much effort.

Which brought me to today. However, I thought I'd try doing things a little differently today. The idea: to lessen the negative aspects of running that have kept me away from it for so long. First to go out were the strict (albeit sensible) rules while running: cadence breathing, proper heel strikes, and the like. They tend to become incredibly mind-numbing and uncomfortable to me... Not something I enjoy. Next, while I've often heard that people run with music, I haven't actually tried it myself. Technically bad practice, but I didn't really care. Anything for the boredom.

So I got up nice and early (it was early for a Saturday morning >.>) and set off to the stadium... Which I found, to my shock and horror, was closed for some sports meet. You know that feeling when you spend days psyching yourself to do something, and then you finally take the step and do it, only to find the situation's changed and your motivation goes out the window? I hate that.

As I walked down around the stadium, stretching and wondering what to do, I came to the other end of the stadium... And found my solution. Little Guilin "小桂林" (the closest thing you get to a rock-face/hill in Singapore) looked so serene, the lake was glittering in the sunlight, and the area was totally silent except for the sounds of nature. Took a quick walk around the trail around it, planned a route, and started running. iPod in hand, breathing and steps out the window and music blasting (I queued four Dragonforce albums up, not knowing what music to use... But it went surprisingly well~). The weight in my hand was a small price to pay for alleviating the boredom that's always made running such a chore for me.

I don't think I've ever really appreciated how nice Little Guilin was as a boy living in the area... But in the quiet of the day and morning sun, it made running there less painful. Another measure I took was to deliberately not monitor my BPM, and not measure my distance or speed... I just ran around the odd circuit I made up.

Not sure if I hurt myself or anything by just ignoring all the rules and structures to follow while running, but it was definitely better than the previous times when I've tried. After all, I'm not really running competitively, for distance or speed or anyone. Just setting a time to stop and running really helped me not to kill myself too (a common occurrence when I stop exercising for a while and try to start again). Perhaps running might be bearable after all, if just barely =P.

On a side note, some food for thought... Picked up a can of 100 Plus on the way back, that fizzy isotonic drink and wondered: is the HCO3- content productive to it's role as a sports drink? Findings in the next post~

Well, I finally found resolve to resurrect this blog. Perhaps some may not have considered it dead, but in my mind it was. 6 months can be a long time, especially true for my last 6 months.

It seems the last time I blogged was in a little room off a side street on the east side of Venice. Brings back fond memories of the trip, and also contrasts. A great many things can change in 6 months. On hindsight, I didn't face all that many.

Sitting here at 1am on a weekday, struggling to stay afloat amidst the torrent of content school has been throwing at me since Year 2 started (from August '09). Strange how current circumstances magnify the past in different ways, isn't it? The three-week trip in Europe seems a distant dream now, and yet the emotional memory; of freedom, fun, and lightheartedness still remain all too real, but all too far away. I haven't had a holiday quite like that since, having nothing to worry about, no strife or stress plaguing my brief respites from the rigors of studying. But I'll have another yet. Last holidays I had, timing and circumstances clashed in such a crippling combination that I was left in a terrible state, and hardly rested for the new term. But thankfully, we're human. We learn, we adapt, and we progress.

Heartbreak, a painful thing, as the name suggests. It wasn't until then that I realised something, I hadn't felt anything close to the level of emotional pain I felt during the time. In terms of emotions, I've had a pretty sheltered life, which I thank God for. I also thank God for the valuable lessons I've learned from the encounter, for His healing and strength, and most of all for His plan and will for my life, and getting me back into it.

A question was raised at cell group tonight: if you could choose to selectively forget any part of your memory, would you (slightly paraphrased)? I don't know if I was thinking straight when I answered no, but I realise now that I meant it. If God is truly in control of my life, forgetting parts of it on purpose only denies a part of the continuous work that He is doing in us through our experiences, shaping our character and honing our being. Of course, much of my life has been lived with God's hand over it; perhaps my answer might be different otherwise?