Went out for my first movie this year(?) with Chris, Greg and David (Transformers!). We had quite a good time, sometimes it's just nice to mingle with people where you don't have to modify your wavelength for them to understand and relate. At least, not much. Chris is just cool =P. But it was fun, and the movie exceed all our expectations.

After that, more fellowship at KFC, then we part ways and I go to... This term's cell social. Yeah, more fun and games. Played some old-fashioned gamecube and n64 and board games. The free pizza owned.

Ended up sleeping at 3, after some gaming late into the night (in keeping with the tradition of the first night of holidays). The hangover only hit in the morning when I realised I was so overburdened with work, that this holiday would rank up there as one of my worst school holidays yet. I really didn't have time to go on living like this, I realised.

So, my resolve set, I went to bed. And got up at 12 noon. At least I got some work done today though (far from what I had hoped to do). I think I'm still recovering in transition from school to holidays. Strange feelings of apathy pervade my every moment now. Oh well. Apathy is here to stay until someone saves me from it's ever tightening grasp.

I can only hope that this holiday will not be in vain. With the current state I'm in, the load of "things to do" which have been all put off until "the holidays", as well as the workload, not to mention rapidly escalating tensions of my parents, particularly my mum. Every holiday, my mum reaches breakpoint at some stage and erupts violently, completely obliberating everything within a million mile radius. I don't expect this holiday to be any different. Today was only the beginning.

Lord, give me the strength to manage my anguish.

I should sleep before my parent's finish their movie. It would be... better.

Good night.

David made me screw around with my blog a bit. Ok, a lot. Apparently it doesn't look very good on his computer at all. Few things I can't/don't know how to fix, which I spent a ridiculous amount of time trying to. Now excuse the pitifully short post.

Today's spec SAC was easily the worst one I've done this year. I still cannot believe how badly I did. It's come to the point where I honestly cannot say if I even managed a pass. Horrible. Still in a state of semi-shock, residue from after coming out of the SAC today. The Happy Cup helped though, sort of. Still got barely any work done today. Tomorrow I really must buck up and work on a proper plan for my last 50 mins of the English SAC. Anything to prevent a repeat.

Even better, the skin around my lips is still sore and cracking. I then somehow managed to bite my upper lip, and two cuts in my gum are starting to get painful too. And I lost my water bottle trying vainly to keep myself hydrated during class. I think it's because I never bring my bottle to classes, so it must have slipped by my absent-minded existence somewhere along the line that I was supposed to have it with me. It's been 2 days, still no sign of it. Grrr.

Should be going now. Need to stop wasting time.

Night.

Never too late.

In flux, the worst state of mind to be in. Neither in nor out, neither right or left. Confusion plaguing every moment, indecision clouding every choice. Sometimes, the most terrible torment exists in the form of dilemmas. Even beyond these impossible choices sometimes lies the overshadowing dread of knowing that, whichever choice you eventually make, failure is the only outcome, and success is highly improbable. That, my friends, is dystopia. And the only way to live within such fiendishly defined parameters is to dwell in the void that lies between, running, hiding, dodging anything which might push you to death on either front. Then again, is such a life of indignity and mortification one worth living at all? Wallowing for an eternity in the unfulfilling void that is inaction... Perhaps the best course of action would simply be to throw yourself at both fronts simultaneously, risk being torn apart by the very fragments of your mind. At least you would know you ceased in a hopeless attempt to succeed, if that is any consolation in the resulting breakdown.

Cruel jokes are life's forte. They've been for the past several weeks. It starts with one, and then cascades worse than an avalanche. No, I will not elaborate. (Cue: Thank God now).

The English SAC is going terribly wrong, I am now left with 1/4 of time to finish over 1/3 of the SAC analysis piece (trust me, it's a lot worse than it sounds). My analysis isn't exactly up to year 7 standard either. Oh well, didn't expect to do so well this time around anyway.

Specialist SAC tomorrow, yet I'm up this late. I think everyone's just too exhausted to concentrate on revision. Let's hope we don't regret it. But knowing Ms. Kimberley, that's precisely what she's good at.

I just realised what a pain it is to rip DVDs into avi format. I had to install 5 applications just to do it. The whole process also takes about 4 hours. Per DVD. Sorry Emily, 1 more day please >.<

Everyone seems to be falling sick now, hello winter... Poor guys, you all look so sad and downcast I can't help but pity you all =(... But I already had my bug this year, at a worse period too. Now I just get to experience the aftereffects like extreme levels of dehydration (the skin around my lips is all swollen, red and cracked). Highly unpleasant. Those of you who don't have to live with winter, please count yourselves lucky. You have no idea how difficult it is to force yourself to drink water when you don't feel thirsty at all (because if you don't you eventually pass out from dehydration or something). Well, for me at least.

I had a mountain of things to blog about, but at almost 1am now (yeah, I opened a new post with the intention to blog, but some things take precedence by default) I think I will leave them off for another day. Not like I can remember half the things I want to write about anyway. Note to self: carry pen and paper around to help remember things I want to blog about. Oh wait, that note is on the blog too... -.-"

Good night.

Just give me a sign.

I've always wondered what it was about music that imbues it with such influence and sway over emotions. It seems to have the effect of magnifying, by frightening proportions, currently existing feelings in listeners. This is especially the case if by some means the music in question forms some sort of connection with the soul of the listener, either through its lyrics, or by its melody which might be related indirectly to a feeling close to their heart. This then logically results in an overflow of these exploding sentiments, very often manifested physically.

Songs are, essentially, words said to a tune. That is all. And yet they possess immense power over us in that it can stimulate the most crippling effects on our emotions, and as a result our mind and will are affected, often adversely (according to the physical task at hand), by the stimulus.

But we just keep on listening.

Bye.

Curse this weakness.

Today, the world ended. More precisely, mine did. Temporarily. Yes, the Uni Bio Mid-year Disaster. I will try not to divulge the details... Only that I doubt I have ever been so unprepared, nor done as badly, nor been as unconfident of my answers after, than has been the case with any other exam in my life. The plus side is that I think that I should have at least managed to pass, of which I honestly expected, and expect, nothing more.

It was an odd feeling, sitting in an examination hall (Royal Exhibition Building) with thousands of students, in casual clothes, on a school morning, in the heart of the city, all alone in the crowd, knowing that you somehow didn't quite belong there. It IS quite a challenge to find familiar faces when there are thoudsands of stressed, sleep-deprived, restless students roaming within a small space outside the entrance waiting for doors to be opened.

Somehow, though, I picked out Sharleen from a distance, and after some application of crowd navigation skillz, managed to say hello. Sharleen was in my 3/4 Chinese class last year (I finished year 12 chinese last year), and is now in some food science course in Melbourne Uni. She also had a Bio exam, the same one. Quite an inopportunate instance for a chance meeting I must say, what with the elevated tensions often associated with the phase of waiting for examination room doors to open. I can hardly remember what was exchanged there, only that I responded like a zombie, and as far as I know so did she. But either way, it was nice to see a familiar face.

After that, from the time I walked into the examination hall, all I saw was familiar face after familiar face. A few other UMEP students (University of Melbourne Extension Program, the thing i'm doing), ex-Wesley students from last year. And then I saw a girl wearing the AC jumper... Well, I was actually stunned for a few seconds before remembering that ACS(I) went co-ed the year I left... Then I realised I was staring (during the exam, she was walking out), so hard that she actually shot me a questioning glance -_-".

Well, no more Uni Bio, at least for the rest of this term. I managed not to do any work at all today. I am two weeks behind with English homework AND classes (yeah, I missed about 4), thank God spec didn't do anything new. Methods SAC continues tomorrow. Chem and Bio mid-years next week. Hooray~.

You guys were so supportive and stuff while I died my slow death, really helped a lot with the stress and motivation! You know who you are, thanks so much!! I really, really appreciate it. It's nice to know that when the world sways, true friends stay constant =).

Bye.

TAA/TAG/TGA.